So the caller that is totally shy that lives with his mom, called yet again. The last time we spoke I told him that he wouldn’t be allowed to stroke his dick to my pictures if he wasn’t able to call me. But I know for a fact his weenie gets nice and hard every time he looks at my huge tits and nice ass. So, I told him that if he gets nice and hard he can hump his pillow like a little pillow humping loser and cum all over the pillow case. Apparently he doesn’t get enough friction to cum all over, which really made me laugh. I see guys on cam constantly humping away and cumming for me with pillow friction. I guess he thought I was going to tell him he could stroke normally but I really do like him humiliating himself for me so I told him that he would still have to hump away at his pillow just harder. I am getting a massive kick out of imagining how he’s going to hid a cum shot on his pillow case. I mean his mother does the laundry, it would seem a little odd if he decided to wash his own sheets. I am so evil and wicked, I absolutely love it. Hump it shy boy, I know you are reading this.

It absolutely never amazes or shocks me anymore when guys call for phone sex saying “Hello Miss Melanie this is pathetic loser (insert your name here)”. What is my immediate reaction to this revelation? I start laughing my ass off of course. Although I am going to have to be careful, I mean I do have a luscious ass afterall and it would be a pity to lose it by laughing too hard. I know all pathetic losers think they are so different when in fact you are just as nasty as the last pathetic loser doing anything to get close to me. Eating my boogers, sniffing my ass and getting farted on, sucking the toe jam from my stinky toes. I mean seriously you will do anything I want you to do just to entertain me. Hell I have even made pathetic losers dunk their heads in their toilets and blow bubbles with the water and flush. Ever had a swirlie given to you by a beautiful brat? I know a few have. Maybe you would like to be a part of Miss Melanies swirlie club! I mean I have the office panty club why not the flush your head in the toilet club? You are pathetic after all and I enjoy every little minute of your patheticness just to entertain me.

Sadistic phone sex comes very naturally to me. Take one of my latest callers for example. This guy called and got put through his paces big time. Anything to amuse me, remember I am supreme, I reign over your cock, your balls, and definitely your orgasm. I am sure you are asking yourself what did I exactly do to him? Well, I backhanded him over and over again across the face, made him drink my spit, ball busted his balls with my foot, sat on his face and smothered him among other things. That was such a fun fucking call and I want more, more, more. Yes that makes me a greedy bitch but I so loved getting sadistic on his ass. I guess you could say that there is a mean side to me along with the brat. Oh yeah and I farted all over his face when I smothered him. This guy was squealing like a girl when he came hard. I guess the farts pushed him over the edge.

Apparently paper clip dick liked seeing how I wrote about him here at Phone Sex Brats diary; so much so that he had to prove to me that the pic of the tiny dick with the paper clip on it was in fact his very own dick. Yes it is him and yes that fucking thing is tiny. He even got out a birthday candle and the candle was even longer than his little dick. It was so fucking funny and all I did was laugh. The only thing he has going for him is that his balls are in proportion to his dick. Yes that means paper clip dick has tiny balls too. I mean I have seen some small dicked men with massive balls and it’s like where the hell is the big dick to go with those balls, it just kind of disappears into the balls. This is funny too but in the case of paper clip dick he does have a dick and balls just really small ones. It’s like his dick and balls forgot that they are supposed to grow. It’s THAT tiny. No wonder he loves to be humiliated about it. There is no pretending that his thing is some huge monster cock or something because it isn’t and he knows it.

I can’t wait until he has the time to put on a full show for me on cam. That will be massive entertainment!

Here’s a little tip from one of my customers if you are hunting for a place to put your frilly girly panties away and be certain that your wife or girlfriend won’t EVER find them. Let me give you a little hint. It has to do with a sport that a lot of corporate males play. Stumped? Well its simple really, just put your little pink girly panties in your golf bag. I know it’s funny because I seriously laughed my ass off at a customer who told me that he always hides his panties in his golf bag so his wife wouldn’t find them. Can you imagine this wife going through a bag that she normally pays no attention to and finding like four to five pairs of women’s panties in it? Now I know that she most likely wouldn’t assume that those panties are her husbands. I am certain she would assume that he’s been cheating on her at the golf course when in fact he probably wears panties while playing golf.

Even though it is funnier than shit, I still thought it was rather creative and had to write about it. So to all you little panty freaks out there, where in the hell do you hide them from wifey? Call me and let me know.

It’s so much fun to give callers “pet” names. I made a new one for a new customer just the other day. He called me for small dick humiliation phone sex and ended up sending me a picture of his tiny little dick. So here I am thinking he’s going to have maybe a three inch dick fully hard. Nothing exciting but not nub size. Well, I was wrong about that one. His dick was rock hard and he had a large paper clip on the top of it so that there was a reference as to how small it really is. How big is a big paper clip? I think it may be just about an inch and a half tops, so mister needle dick truly has a needle dick. Hence the new “pet” name of paper clip dick. The shocker was that he’s not a virgin. Seriously, how the fuck would that thing ever be able to penetrate even the tiniest of pussies? Dry hump I can picture in my mind but not actual pussy penetration. I feel so sorry for the girl that he screwed and I am sure it was a one time thing. Her laying on her back with her legs spread ready to get fucked like an animal, lights off (they would have to be off to even get this far) and something pokes you and you aren’t quite sure what it is. He’s grunting and groaning and you don’t even know why. I mean, it isn’t even IN YET. And then the tiny dick cums. What an erotic, wild evening. Well at least for him anyhow. He knows he isn’t good enough to be fucked by a pretty girl, or any girl for that matter. But he is good enough to be severely humiliated by me and my friends. It’s what you crave afterall.

I know some can’t wrap their heads around some wimp calling for phone sex and all he really wants to be is ignored. What an easy call! Ignoring you just like every other female on the planet and getting paid for it! Listening to me watch some TV show, do my class work, read, chat with my girlfriends online or even call one of them while I ignore your ass 100%. How fucking pathetic and humiliating. Even a phone sex girl ignores you.

Wouldn’t your friends just love to know you call Princess Kaylee and beg her to not pay any attention to you? I know you are yanking your tiny little dicklet the whole damned time and even more so when I start laughing at how pathetic you are. You are probably one of those guys that cums in his pants at the most embarrassing times. Like when you buy some hot girl a drink at a club and she tells you to fuck off.

What’s even more pathetic is when you jerk your little dick at home thinking about how hot and mean she was to you later that night. Although I like it much better when your balls get as blue as my pretty eyes. I am thinking the next pig that calls to be ignored is going to be sent away with blue balls, if you can hold onto it that is. Either way Princess Kaylee laughs all the way to the bank!

Yes Princess Melanie is laughing so evilly right now. It seems as though the shy virgin boy that still lives with his mom and calls me from the garage is paranoid that I am turning him into a faggot. Why? Because all he wants to do is cum on his face now. His dick can’t even get hard unless he thinks about it.

Obviously he called me, actually just yesterday, and kept saying “fuck you are turning me into a faggot, I am sorry Princess but fuck“. I am laughing so hard right now tears are running down my face.

I have yet to hear that I am turning a caller into a faggot. But now that he gave me this little bit of information, I know exactly how I am taking the next call. I know you are reading this shy boy. Are you scared faggot? That’s what I thought but I know that you won’t be able to resist me for long. I know that you want to call me every day. Because someone likes to cum on their face for Princess Melanie.

Oh this one is a fun one! I had a guy call me during the Holiday that was either drunk or stoned on something (although I am positive it was probably BOTH) and was like totally into demolishing everything in his house. I am not kidding! EVERYTHING.

Naughty, bratty Princess Kaylee made him break all of his dishes from coffee cups to plates, lamps, picture frames, vases, coffee table, stomped on all his DVD’s. Hell I even made him cut up his couch with a knife. He did this just so Princess would allow him to stroke himself. But the funniest part of it all was that he couldn’t cum if his life depended on it because he was so fucked up.

He could barely talk and was upset that his dick was only half hard but he would start whining and begging, “please young Princess, please may I break more so I can play with my dick“. I guess he thought the more he broke the harder his dick would get. Hell if I know but it didn’t work. The only thing that really happened was more money for me and massive entertainment and he ended up with an apartment full of broken junk.

Good times

Stinky, nasty, sweaty ass! Yes men like everything from clean to nasty and I get such a laugh out of guys that beg me “Princess Melanie please don’t put your stinky, nasty, sweaty ass down on my face“. Bwahahaha, like I am not going to do it? I want you to squirm under my luscious, stinky butt. I will smother you with it. I will make you gag at the scent. Perhaps not showering a few days straight and working out like normal and then using your face like a seat cushion.

Yes there are freaks out there that love this shit and I love talking to them. The all encompassing odor fetish. You know, dirty ass, arm pit sniffing, stinky feet, musky crotch, etc. These are the same guys that secretly wait for the secretaries at work to go home so they can then sniff the seats of the chairs they have been sitting in all day long. You like the smell don’t you freak.

Come on little slave boy, sniff sniff, I just got home from the gym and haven’t showered yet!